06.29.10

Officially Knocked Up

Posted in Monthly, Baby Krise at 3:06 pm by Pasha

By Pasha Holiday

We all knew this was going to happen. In a family of six women that get pregnant when a man looks their way, it really was inevitable. That is how I got 16 nieces and nephews (and two great-nieces!) And to think I even spent a moment of worry on fertility, hah!

About two years ago, before I was engaged to be married, tied the knot, bought our little fixer upper and was impregnated, I wrote a blog about the three M’s: marriage, mortgage and motherhood. I wrote about waiting patiently for them to happen, for life to finally happen. Because after 27 years of being selfish, spending days and weeks planning for only myself, I wanted to share this life with a family of my own. I yearned to buy a house and fix it up, to have something to do every day instead of default on menial responsibilities and lay at the beach with a book all day. I wanted to marry Matthew. I knew there wasn’t a chance I would love a man as wonderful or as equally yolked as myself. And most of all, I wanted to have children. Because the one thing I have always wanted to be, since I was about 6-years-old, before wanting to become a writer, a wife, or a homeowner, was a mama.

All three M’s have happened in these past two years of blessings. Life starts to move pretty quick when you release the breaks and put the petal to the metal. Poor Matthew knew that as soon as he put that ring on my left hand I was eager to get pregnant. I look back now and thank heavens for his logic in waiting the 9 months to try for a baby.

There was so much work to put into the house to get it ready for a baby to live in it. I think back to the buckets of mortar used to tile walls and floors, the mounds of dust off the plaster walls, the lumber for the fence (oh, wait, I was pregnant for that one) and the general angst of remodeling this home ourselves. If I had been even a little pregnant, there would have been so much less I could and would have done, like tearing out green board and installing cement backer board myself. I would have never been able to sand lead paint and lacquer from every riser on the staircase, I probably would not have climbed so high on the ladder (wait, I think I was preggers for that one, too!) In any case, the house would be no where near as settled and as halfway finished as it is today had I gotten knocked up immediately following our August nuptials.

There is so much still left to do with the other two M’s. We are working on our marriage, as any couple who has been together six years and been married one do. We are ALWAYS working on the house, with only two sides of a lined sheet of paper left to go before the baby comes. And the impending motherhood is, of course, a work in the first stages of progress.

This week I am 15 weeks pregnant, almost four months. My body has changed considerably. My belly is puffed out (possibly the ice cream, I know!) My boobs are nearly a ‘D’ cup. And my lean mean machine has become soft and supple with my new baby weight. I am fraught with the thought of how this will all turn out, but that is just the selfish Pasha, rearing 29 years of being the only person in this body. In the end, with my belly stretched to the max and my husband’s psyche damaged by the inevitable labor, it will all eventually become normal again.

At four months I am just on the cusp of totally pregnant and only five more months to finish this house and prepare for baby. There are tales to be told about pregnancy, it is all a wonder for us first-timers. I can barely look forward to the first week, the first month, or the first year of the baby’s life. For now, I am going to try and enjoy this first time for everything. Waiting for the baby’s little kicks, my first maternity jeans, birthing class, decorating the nursery and finally, kissing our beautiful baby.

***Coming soon with be Pasha’s New Baby Blog. Stay Tuned!***