I Loathe Christmas

Posted in Monthly at 9:57 am by Pasha

By Pasha Krise

Get the firing squad ready and prepare your torches, this witch is finally letting it out. I loathe Christmas, every one else’s favorite holiday.

There were a few years of my 34 that I did like it. Maybe a few of the early years, a couple in early adulthood when putting up a tree was still a novelty, and maybe one there after. But as the years roll forward and the pressure cooker that is the holiday season slowly builds and builds, I am calling it as I see it, a total sham.

Let’s start where it begins and where, ultimately, all holidays go to die, at the mega-mart. These China-made, trinket-hawking hubs pull in the jolly revelers even before the Thanksgiving turkey leaves the oven. Like a bunch of neanderthals, the “bots” (this is how I refer the the Christmas robots, obsessed with spending and that fat guy) form lines at stores that are about to take all the the money that the bots don’t have to spend, on junk that will be hauled to the trash in no time. Holiday tunes have been playing on the loudspeakers since Back to School was still the push. Bots will shove, hair-pull and thrash their way to the last Elsa doll, so their kid-bots can truly feel the love on Christmas.

Here is the catch, on Christmas morning, that doll didn’t come from you, it came from Mr. Diabetic himself, Ole Saint Nick.

All that is wrong with America, all that is terrible about parenting, all that is unGodly, can be unmasked by taking a closer look into Santa Clause. So, parents push their children into the laps of a fake guy, who is morbidly obese and usually reeks of whiskey. For months leading to the holidays, kids are told this guy is watching them … even when they sleep! Does anyone else find that horrific? Be good or else a fat guy won’t give you gifts?!?!?! How does that do little people a service? They learn to appease a total stranger, that its OK to be watched, in the name of gifts. Anyone else think that is a setting our children up with the wrong ideas? Or how about that parents lie to their kids, over and over and over again about it. Trust is sacred. And besides, random men with high blood pressure and a serious addiction to ginger snaps is not stealing this moms thunder when the perfect gift is found under the tree. All hugs, kisses and appreciation can be delivered right into this mamas waiting arms.

Between Christmas cards, chopping down the earths’ trees, energy sucking lights, generic gifts of candles, food dye cookie-making, festivus parties, Elf on the Shelf, Mall Santa, travelling and being the perfect steward, can we just say ENOUGH! Where do we draw the line between what we do because we love and believe in it and what we do because all the Jones’ do it. Here is my line, I have drawn it in the sand, and I am not sorry that we will only be participating in what we love about the holy days of CHRISTmas.

My four-year-old, Decker, was truly in love with all things Christmas this year, but mostly, the idea of getting to open lots of presents. He argued that Santa is real; I let it go and never actually said Santa is a fraud, but made sure he knew mom and dad had worked hard to find him things he would love and then to wrap and deliver. We took out the big blue box of decorations, put on silly sweaters and decorated, even I like that part. We honored OUR family tradition and bought a plant that we would use all year, this year it was a rosemary bush. Decker picked out a new ornament to commemorate 2014 for our family. We made sweets with loved ones, ate too many. We made three dozen gifts for our families, we visited the “Christmas Trains” at the museum (no different than any other day there) and I didn’t even protest when Decker sat on the fat guys’ lap.

We packed our little family into our sleigh and traveled 14 hours to be with family. We settled in, played in the snow, opened gifts, ate too much sugar, and enjoyed Christmas. On Christmas Eve, we read the Christmas Star, a book about the gifts that the wise men brought for baby Jesus. And the next morning, Decker and Hudson woke to find presents under the tree (only half, as we had a second Christmas at home!) I sourced 90% of this years gifts to my children second hand, I was so proud to see how much they loved the tag-still-on Discovery Fort ($50, I paid $3!) Decker asked for a robot and got a robot dog and a robot dinosaur! Stockings overflowed with organic chocolate and the electric toothbrushes he had begged for. We played with our Whoopee Cushion, Slinkees and new game of checkers. Aunt and uncles flowed in throughout the day, bringing hand-made gifts.

So while I still hate Christmas in the traditional, consumer-centric sense of the word, I love the culmination of the season. I love being with our families, I love watching my children filled with joy (and sugar, can’t forget the sugar!) I love a week off without work, with my three boys. I love morning breakfasts of farm-fresh eggs and a freshly stoked stove with my mama and papa. And mostly, I love the opportunity to teach my boys that Jesus’ love is a gift, and it is the reason we celebrate together.


Back in Action

Posted in Monthly at 9:12 am by Pasha